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Friday, July 29, 2005
+ The Madcap Adventures of Dolph, El Iano and The Spawn of Satan +
Tales of Daring-do, Faulty Toilets and a Shrieking Lobster  Nick.... Marcus... Ian Spawn of Satan, Dolph and El Iano respectively...... protecting what is closest to our hearts A Tale of Two Cities In Singapore, hotels may give u a complimentary basket of fruit. In Bali, they give u complimentary bottled water. The irony is, the bottled water will be 10 times more precious to u than a basket of fruit anyday. S'pore: u spend 2 to 3k trying again and again for that elusive driver's license. Bali: Primary school kids whizzin around on motorbikes. Though choice to make eh? S'pore: GST 5%, service tax 10% Bali: service tax 15%, plus you're too embarrassed to ask for 5000 rupiah in change. S'pore: Parents worry kids watch too much MTV. Bali: Our TV has zero reception, so we use it to air our clothes. Hell, it doesn't air anythin else rite? S'pore: An unbeatable range of cuisine is under S$5. Bali: S$200 makes u a millionare. i was a millionare and a bankrupt 3 times in 4 days. S'pore: Reports of ATMs failing to dispense the specified amt. Bali: Our room toilet flushes and refuses to stop. Even overnight. Over-achiever indeed. The Call of the Beach 6 am run along the grey sands of Kuta beach with Marcus. Felt goood.. then realised some amazon-babe archetype was running laps around us... BAREFOOT!! Saw her finish off by heading straight for McDonalds. Good on you babe, u earned your Big Breakfast. Awoke Nick back in the room, and we got the whole 39 strokes tounge lashing. His main argument was "Who goes jogging on holilday?!". Whiner. Got a whole slew of water sports on Bali's Southern coast. Para-sailing, banana-boating, jet-skiing, snorkelling. Snorkelling was the most value for money. Its exactly as shown on National Geographic. Taking bets on Marcus' chances of being eaten by a shark. Beach was fanastic, you can walk out a hundred feet and still be in waist deep crystal clear water. Dinner at Jimbulan Beach,the candle light, the pseudo-spanish band, the noise of 10 foot surfer waves smashin the beach, yup, the whole enchilada.  Spawn of Satan briefly considers a last minute conversion. Adventures on the Awang River (dingy approaching rapids) Instructor: "Your first time white water rafting?" 3 of us: "Yup." Instructor: "Me too!" *cheeky grin* (-_-")(-_-")(-_-")... Bugger of an instructor.. he even directed us to paddle the raft in reverse while it was spinning... so we blindly follow until we ran smack into a rock... throwing us into extremely unglamorous positions. He topped of the move with an evil laughter.... hahahhaha... one helluva ride River bend; supposedly calm waters,so we wade in to snap photos... and nearly get swept downriver. Now THAT would have made the 6 o'clock news. Tour guide says our hotel is actually a few blocks away from the Bali Bombing Ground Zero. Our parents won't be too pleased to hear all the shit we learnt today. Apart from the near-death experience on the river and our proximity to the terrorist target, had a brush with Bali's sleazy underbelly. Usually guys ask u on the street: "U need taxi?", or "Transport sir?" 3rd day saw questions like "Women u wan?"..and.. "Marijuana?" The novelty and absolute audacity of the last offer really stunned us as we walked by, couldn't even get offended at the guy for supposing we were junkies. Gone with the Waterbom Welcome to Bali's version of Fantasy Island, yes, its spelt w-a-t-e-r-b-o-m. Went there straight after rafting and didn't know how much time we had, so immediately hantam the biggest, nastiest slide in the park. Smooth Move. Its called "Smashdown", i kid u not. Hiked up 5 storeys to the mouth of the monster. The slide was most aptly named, one section consisted of a 3 storey near-vertical drop. i went down, and actually went airborne, and let loose a gut-wrenching cry of fear and anguish. Which immediately became the talking point of the day. *fume* As we discovered time was in fact, not of the essence, me and Nick went repeatedly on the lesser slides, berating Marcus' decision to spend 18USD to try all the slides once each then laze ard for a tan. The day's anti-climax was the trek back to the hotel... a good 45mins on foot. Nick wants to rename himself "Odysseus". We are utterly wasted today. Feast of the Gods day 2 Breakfast 8am: Omelettes, chicken, veg, fruit Lunch 3pm: Steak sandwhich Dinner 6.30pm: a seafood platter which would put Fish n Co. to shame Supper 10pm: 2 Dunkin Donuts, the "Yokozuna" Lobster Sashimi, Shabu-shabu, cup'o'Hagen Daz ice cream (by here we're comatose in da hotel room, im slurping the melted cookies n cream in a brazen display of pure sloth, while tryin to convince them im training my paitience in waitin for the ice cream to melt) If we didn't have so much to do over those days i'd swear i'd come back a fatty. The jap resturants obviously pride themselves on freshness. Lobster Sashimi was fresh, too fresh, ALIVE fresh! We were eating happily, until suddenly the feelers start moving. Not too alarmed... then the EYES start swivelling!! the friggin EYES!!! STARING AT US!!! (Marcus was directly in front of it, im beside him, Nick got the tail-end and nonchalantly continues eating despite our protests) Then all of a sudden, the LEGS move!!! its trying to PROP ITSELF UP!!!AAAHHHH!!! wadahell?! will the muthafuka run off the friggin table?! We've already eaten HALF of it!!!! So Marcus is screamin "Ian! Kill it!! Kill it!!", and i try to knock it out with the chopsticks by rapping it on the head. Then it lets out this SHRIEKING NOISE!! AAAHHHHH!!!! It sounds like a rat on ganja! Hysteria abated shortly, we try as best to continue eating then it SQUEAKS AGAIN!! AAHHH!!! eventually the bugger died down... literally... we miraculously could finish our meal and then go on to order Shabu-shabu....hahhahahhaha... we later discuss wat could have gone thru the invertebrate's mind in its final moments.  Cheers! *raises wine glass, cringes at lobster on a platter*
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
+ a Hairy Situation +
     suspected felon wanted for illegally trafficking oompa loompas to Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.yup, had some radical shades on my head for a full 3 days 2 nites. sounds like a vacation. By the way, Willy Wonka looks like a he was raised by the cast of Little Britain. Hollywood actually found a way to make Johnny Depp look like a fag. Ingenious.  Cheers! *raises wine glass*
Sunday, July 24, 2005
+ Busy Little Bees +
ok... apologies over the lack of updates... but i'm trying to give the bees a run for their money... so here's an extract from the crazy few weeks before my matriculation week. 10th July-------- following the immense sucess in the Fashion Show, Synthesis youth cell T-shirt sales soared. Support for the youth movement is all the rage. 10th july i was in charge of a Mini Fund Raising for the liquid funds needed for youth activities. 5 cells took part, thank God everything went as planned. 11th------- driving lesson in the morning, met Marcus to book tix to Bali in the afternoon, driving theory at night....... man, i'll need this vacation. 12th------- day spent at Campus Crusade freshmen activities, night at me grand dad's 83 b'dae... the guy's a voracious reader, i put his longevity down to havin continually givin his brain somethin to do. 13th------- driving e-trial test, pass, good sign, guess i won't be havin to study much after all. Celebrate by dying my hair dark bronze with blone streaks. My dad hit the proverbial roof, and shit hit the proverbial fan. 14th------- driving lesson again... damn instructor called me an "impatient driver"... c'mon so i did 70km/h on a minor road... checked my theory guidebook, damn, ok maybe i was speedin justa bit...hahahaha... pls, i have da mightly "L" plate! all drivers out there, FEAR ME!!!! MUAHAHAH!!! Attempted negotiations with Dad broke down... the Cold War continues... siiiiiiiigh... 15th------- This can't go on... relations with Dad deteriorating by the day... somethin's gotta give... so i decide my hair's gotta go, back in black. i respect my Dad, but this is clearly misguided rage. Oh well, night out with Beatrice n Shawn, Baybeats Concert was coool... pity JJ cldn't make it. 16th------- Out with Marcus n Nick to find a good pair'o'boardshorts... don't leave to Bali without 1, ever... its damn useful, trust me. But i can't find a pair i like. Worship practice next, whoa man, lotsa Chinese songs this time ard, weird... twilight zone weird... never played so much Chinese songs b4, just another of life's little challenges. Dinner with maternal grandma. 17th------- Church worship goes well... Cell group lookin enthu, good sign... finally found a killer pair of boardshorts at Plaza Sing, ya, they rebuilt Plaza Sing ok? Back to Baybeats concert to scope out new bands. "Tempered Mental" from Malaysia? Whoa!!! Sounds HARDCORE!!! When i found them, they where about as hardcore as Michelle Branch. hahahhah. Misleading Malaysians, M&Ms. hahahhah!! Marcus joined me.. Electrico was a blast... nothing fuels inspriation like a sucessful local band with original sounding tunes. 18th------- Driving inda morn, made a 60km/h right turn, all set for the next installment of 2 fast 2 furious. Packed bags in afternoon, flew to Bali at night with Marcus and Nick. Had really goood steak medallions for supper for about $10. 19th------- 6am run along the sandy shores of Bali with Marcus. Some crazy surfer dudes were actually there before us. Water sports after breakfast...para-sailing, banana boating, jet skiing, snorkelling on the reefs. Monsta feast at night, thats putting it mildy, will explain in greater detail in subsequent posts. 20th------- White water rafting inda mornin, water theme park afta noon, night shoppin. 21st------- Last minute shoppin, spent loose currency on Mambo... MAMBO?? this clearance sale was no joke, damn lucky to find it. Flight back to Singapore. God, i love our airport. All other Asian airports really have nothin close. 22nd------- Driving Final Theory Test inda mornin, fail, AARRGGHH!! (yes folks, u probably do have to study for it) Driving lesson in the afternoon, (hell i've been driving a lot lately, innit?) good reviews this time, yay! only 1 more lesson until i can drive the test routes. YEC meeting after dinner... bugdet reports are so good we'll celebrate with a bbq on 29th. YAY!!! Free FOOOD!!! 23rd------- rest at last. 2 days till matriculation. Cheers! *raises wine glass*
Friday, July 15, 2005
+ Fresh start? i'll be fresh tml......ZZzzzzzzz +
So... this is me first post on da new template... i feel fucking good, pardon my explitives, but its 3 am and i'm in no mood for metaphors........ I've slaved over the drafts n ideas for days and i'm finally happy with the result... plenty'o'shit has hit the fan in the past few days (which i shall be inclined to discuss after a good night's sleep) Cheers! I am uncle istavahn! *rambles other unmentionables, sips wine glass*
Monday, July 11, 2005
+ June youth camp taupok pix +
5 today la... once i edit then i'll post...  You might think its funny... being dragged into sea by female imps is not funny  Mud taupok! We betrayed Joshua! duh... We turned on anythin that moved....  Clement is next!  One of our cleaner moments... relatively  i see dead people... thats all folks! Cheers! see u next year? *raises wine glass*
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
+ a fool full of feelings too +
We can't disregard our feelings... with considerable effort we can however, choose how to feel about something. lookadit from different angle. i didn't say it was easy. Do u think its easier just cos im a "heartless guy?"... la la blah blah... label me all you want... this was how i chose to live... with feelings subservient to rationality....i remember conciously making the decision when i was 14. As with everything, it has pros and cons... as with every major decision, i sometimes questioned it. Well, im sticking with it. My passions are where i want them to be... under control? nah... what kinda passion is under control?.. more like pointed in a general direction. i was conciously searching for myself for 4 long years, a search which ended somewhere early this year... i sought the past... a noisy,pushy fool.. then a silent fool.. then finally the fool sought to be wise... but halfway the fool was clad in camo and nearly lost himself, very nearly lost his foolish ways... then i found the fool. i am me. How many people can stare at the mirror, or watch those deep animes, or read the works of dead philosophers and say that, knowing full well what the hell you are talking about? i am not what i look like. i am not my possessions. i am not my skills. Cos if all those were taken away, i would still be me. i am what i believe in. i am my experiences. i am why i do what i do. did i miss anythin? feel free to add to the list. Go ahead, find yourself, if u don't like what u see, u can change... cos u can choose to be u. Go out and try it... taste it, taste it all... victories AND defeats. right now i feel good. Found the fool yet? or somethin entirely different? Cheers! If it hurts to think... dun think too much! *raises wine glass, chugs it, passes out* The Fool on the Hill -The Beatles Day after day alone on the hill, The man with the foolish grin is keeping perfectly still, But nobody wants to know him, They can see that he's just a fool, And he never gives an answer, But the fool on the hill Sees the sun going down, And the eyes in his head, See the world spinning around. Well on his way his head in a cloud, The man of a thousand voices talking perfectly loud But nobody ever hears him, Or the sound he appears to make, And he never seems to notice, But the fool on the hill Sees the sun going down, And the eyes in his head, See the world spinning around. And nobody seems to like him They can tell what he wants to do. And he never shows his feelings, But the fool on the hill Sees the sun going down, And the eyes in his head, See the world spinning around. He never listens to them, He knows that they are the fools They don't like him, The fool on the hill Sees the sun going down, And the eyes in his head, See the world spinning around.
Sunday, July 03, 2005
+ whats ur flava? tell me whats ur flava +
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